Meme Madness Monday - it's only a theory!

Welcome to our October 9 edition of Meme Madness. I thought I'd look at some creationist/anti-evolution memes.

What is really odd about evolution denial is it has nothing whatsoever to do with religious belief or belief in a deity. When I was a Catholic, I was taught evolution. I was also taught that a lot of the Bible was allegorical and written by men who had limited understanding of the world. I wasn't taught to idolize the Bible like fundies are. I know lots of Protestants who accept evolution too. It shouldn't be that big a deal. Even though the science says the process was unguided, lots of religious people can believe that it actually was guided by their deity and made to look unguided because... the guy's a dick? I don't know why, but anyway, if you can believe in a talking snake, a dude who made a stick turn into a snake and parted the Red Sea, and another dude who walked on water and changed water into wine, why do you have such a problem with species changing over time?

Any atheist who has watched a YouTube video with creationists also knows that they tend not to understand the theory of evolution. Enter meme #1:
"You see, it's a fact, even if it's a theory cause we told it to you!"

So, right off the bat, we have a misunderstanding of the scientific word theory. I shouldn't have to spell this out, (sigh) but just so we all know. In colloquial use, a theory is a guess. I have a theory about why socks disappear in the wash. I don't know. I'm about to make something up. In science a theory is a model. It explains a data set. So this firstly relies on this little shell game of pretending or failing to understand what words mean in a field.

Second, I've heard this a butt-ton, that evolution is a "story" or "just a story." The good folks at Answers in Genesis like to say this on their show Answers News. Evolutionists are just makin' it up, people! They have no idea.

One of the issues in the layman's mind, I think, is that most of us learn about evolution in some grade in school. It's "told" to us and we hear a "story" - just like lots of things we learn. The story is a way to put it in order for our heads and help us memorize it. But it's not a story like The Lord of the Rings is a story. It is a "story" in that scientists put events in an order for us. But creationists like to act like there just no evidence anywhere! No transitional forms! No "new information" in the DNA! And blah blah - I can't hear your evidence I'm busy looking at the perfect design of the intelligent designer.

I'm not sure there's much we can do to point such people in the right direction. The evidence is there, people. Now show us something beyond your book saying your god did it and tell us how he did. We'll be over here progressing science.

Meme #2: "I am an Evolutionist"

Let's skip over the random capitalization of Evolutionist, like it was a nationality or member of a religion or some other proper noun. Or like it was even a thing. How about just biologist or person who accepts evolution.

But you know, I get it. They want to create some group that's like a religion and claim Darwin was some prophet or whatever. Never mind that no one accepts the theory just because Darwin wrote a book.

Now, usually, I like these "what X thinks I do" and "what I really do" memes. They are often witty and clever. This one is just stupid.

I don't get most of them.

First off, why would your parents think you plug your ears up? I'm calling projection on this one. This is what creationists do. They say "Nope, ain't no evidence nowheres! Nope, look at them trees, how beautiful! Look at the eye! How perfect! What good is half an eye! Look at the flagellum!" They reject any evidence. Evolution has evidence.

"What my friends think I do": this is stupid too, wouldn't you have friends that would be like you? I think they would see you in a better light, not screaming like an idiot. I think it should be "what creationists think I do." That would be more appropriate.

"What society thinks I do": seriously? Society mistakes people who accept evolution for some kind of emo punk girl? Again, I think this should be "what creationists imagine me to be."

"What the Catholic church thinks I do": Um, no. The Catholic church accepts evolution and indeed the Big Bang and much of science. They see their god as the originator of creation. Maybe you mean the Southern Baptist Convention or random fundies around the US.

"What I think I do": well, this would be accurate if we are talking about biologists who teach the theory. Biologists often to have a teaching gig somewhere. But, usually this square in these types of memes is supposed to poke fun at the person's self-image as something more important and grandiose. So, to creationists, "evolutionists" only imagine that they are teaching anything.

"What I really do": a typical college student sleeping? I'm actually surprised they didn't go for living in a basement spending time on the internet. This is a pretty lame ending for this meme. I would have gone for sending people to hell, eating barbecue babies, heiling Hitler while goose-stepping or working for Planned Parenthood.

I mean, if I were into the spirit of the meme.

So this meme presumes that the evolutionist's parents and friends don't accept evolution and despise the person, that society rejects evolution, which is untrue, that the Catholic Church rejects it (also untrue) and that people who believe in evolution are lazy students who think more highly of themselves than they should.

This meme is more stunning than offensive, so terrible in its use of "wit" and "humor" and overall just a waste of the meme-maker's time. Come on, creationists, up you game!