The UN is the Tower of Babel

Michele Bachmann is ready to inspire the evil United Nations

And we're back! After a wonderful trip full to Iceland of natural wonder, good seafood, and buckets of skyr, I am back to the most greatest awesomest country on earth. I could feel the return to greatness as we entered US airspace. On a more serious note, it was nice to be away from non-stop insane statements and news. Sure, I would hook back into the interwebs and see what nonsense 45 was spouting, but it wasn't, like, in my face the whole time. I left with fire and fury and come back to see we're in Nazimerica. Adjusting expectations... now.

Coming back to RightWingWatch, I find everyone's favorite Christian ex-representative Michele Bachmann has been appointed by a fundie, Jim Garlow of the Skyline Church, as "new pastor to the United Nations."

Sure. Whatever. I mean, one might ask rhetorically if they really need a pastor. But of course, we're talking Christian theocrats, so the non-rhetorical answer is yes, everyone needs to be guided by the holy spirit or some shit. And the United Nations, whose declarations lack any teeth and are mainly symbolic of the whole world coming together as imperfect humans to hammer out answers to our common problems, needs, just needs the guidance of a homophobic, sexist, jealous, genocidal, unscientific supernatural being to tell it the correct solutions. Otherwise, if it's just us humans putting together a Frankenstein's monster of a resolution, that can only be the work of Satan or the Anti-Christ.

With that, let's here what Bachmann has to say about the U.N.: "I don't know a darker, more deceived place on earth than the U.N." Say what? There are caves on our planet in pitch blackness, and there are all manner of loony people who believe the earth is flat or the center of the universe, that we never landed on the moon and that the government is spraying chemtrails to poison everyone. But no, the U.N., that imperfect gathering of humans is dark and deceived.

Back to Bachmann: "Because as we saw at the Tower of Babel, that's probably the also time we saw all the nations of the earth come together in a moment of deception..." (blink, blink) What? I mean, of course you believe the fable of the Tower of Babel, but what evidence is there that it happened? How do you know that was the whole planet? Also, is it just me or is it strange how these fundy types don't seem to recognize the thousands of years of history between the Old Testament and now? Everyone is David or Moses or whatever. We're always reliving Jericho or the flood. I mean, come on. Seriously, go look at everything that has happened and get some perspective.

Returning to MB: "Their goal has been from the very beginning, the creation of a one-world order; but not a one-world order under the umbrella of the Holy Spirit, a man's attempt at a one-world order that only brings chaos, confusion, deception, delusion, pain. And that's where, rather than cursing the darkness, Skyline Church is about to light a candle." Ah, the one-world order conspiracy, compliments of the book of Revelation! Thank you, Anti-Christ! But you know, the only delusion I see is in MB's head. And confusion and chaos is part of the human experience. We are limited in what information we have; people can deceive us, and we have to work to find the best solutions.

By the way, the pain she mentions, her god doesn't seem to care that much about it. The Bible is full of pain, the world is full of pain, children are dying of curable diseases and hunger, and even in the first world, people suffer and get ill. Usually fundies tell us that it's there to teach us a lesson. It's all part of god's plan.

What I don't know is how can you tell what sky dude wants? There's a little story of a man trapped on his roof in a flood and two boats and a helicopter come by. The man refuses all the help and dies. When he gets to heaven, god says he sent them. The lesson being that we are supposed to help ourselves. But in MB's head, the United Nations - an act of people trying to improve their lot - bad. How does she know? How can she tell that it's not her god's will?

I know you can't get a clear answer. When you've invented a god, that god believes whatever you do, hates all the same people and things that you do, and generally agrees with you.

I've said it before and I'll say it again, invoking a god is a way to shut down conversation. It's a way to avoid a real discussion about our problems and the real solutions to them. Saying god agrees with you means that no disagreement is possible.

(Via: RightWingWatch.org)